For DAC

The date is cancelled, because everybody so far has let me down or I was just to egocentric expecting advance prayers for a half-crazed nobody claiming to be chosen to save the world, depending on how you look at it. And, erm, it´s mighty shitty weather right now, anyway, huh? (And the flue on top of that doesn´t help much.)

So, I thought I wait until it gets warmer and my spirit comes back and settle for a rather unspectacular start instead, no massage bench, no trailer with no expensively-made logo on it, no press conference with the mayor of Freiburg like he has promised (for he hasn´t kept his promise so far).

Jack will just hit the road and keep on running or as an option after the money is gone and nothing works out return in shame to lick his wounds, plan better and then do a fresh start later again.

Anyway, here´s at least something really half-crazed crappy – I have decided to return to what I have originally planned, I do not want to insult the universe, I want to ask it´s forgiveness! And of course, I am not an immortal, not the whole universe, not in alphabetical order and not everybody. In fact, just one person.

The woman that has refused to talk to me for six years now! I will kneel in every church on the way through all of Europe and ask for her forgiveness! Also, I will take a picture of me on every place-name sign with a sign in my hands, please “forgive me” and then maybe the first name of here (I am not sure yet) or perhaps “stop treating me like shit”. For this what I want to say! It is not right, girls, to treat a man who has loved you like shit, just because you don´t want him. Let him down, ok, but be at least a little bit more tactful, that´s all I´m asking for!

I will also apply for an official Guinness-book world-record attempt “most pathetic loser”, no, hang on, “most spectacular and persistent way to ask for a woman´s forgiveness”!

For I am not one of these ordinary run-of-the-mill self-declared world-savers, I am special!

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About Jochen Lembke

Europe's cab-driving writer
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